


you can’t even see how much you’re mine

by citriciel



Category: Cobra Kai (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Binary Boyfriends, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Eli is Bad at Feelings, Fluff, Friends to Enemies to Lovers, Getting Together, Hawkmeat, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Making Out, Making Up, somebody give these two a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:48:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28829175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/citriciel/pseuds/citriciel
Summary: “You shouldn’t hide that, you know. It’s always been perfect,” Demetri said, glancing down to the scar quickly before meeting Eli’s eyes. He leaned in, and Eli’s heart jumped into his throat. As if his body was practicing a familiar kick, Eli automatically leaned into the warmth of Demetri, the scent, the familiarity.Or,Eli tries to apologize, and Demetri tries to remind him of how beautiful he is.
Relationships: Demetri & Eli "Hawk" Moskowitz, Demetri/Eli "Hawk" Moskowitz
Comments: 21
Kudos: 149





	you can’t even see how much you’re mine

**Author's Note:**

> Me, frantically writing this oneshot after finishing the entire series in a week after a 4-year hiatus from writing fics: I just think they're a neat couple!
> 
> Anyway, I was obsessed with the idea of Demetri kissing Eli's scar and telling him how beautiful it is, as someone who has had self-esteem issues due to scars. Also, the, "You wanna kiss me so bad ;)" meme was made for Demetri, so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯.
> 
> The title is from the song lemon eyes by meg myers which in part inspired me to write this, and I listened to it and DNA by Ludovico Einaudi the entire time I was writing, so I recommend giving them both a listen!

“Look, man, I’m sorry. For all of it.”

Demetri replayed the words in his head, over and over again. At his desk, his laptop lay closed. His backpack was abandoned on the floor, full of AP Bio and Calc homework. He lay in bed, turned away from the impending hours of studying. He couldn’t bear to even think about it. 

All he could think about was Eli. All he could think about were those impossibly bright blue eyes, switching from love to hate. The sickening crunch as his arm broke. The countless nights spent playing Magic: The Gathering with Eli, stealing up to the secret crawl space that Demetri’s mom had found a few years after moving in. The contrasting memories swirled together in his mind, melding into a confusing combination.

He had never had many friends, but he always knew he had Eli in his corner. Well, at least until a few months ago. They had spent their entire childhood together, building Lego sets, and watching Doctor Who. Now, his TV sat untouched on its stand. He couldn’t bring himself to turn the TV on and watch without Eli. Their trophy from the coding competition was stuffed under his bed; all the pictures of him and Eli were collecting dust in a corner of his desk drawer. He went to the comic store by himself now, browsing the shelves and grimacing at the thought of the time Eli confronted him about the Yelp review. 

But even now, even after everything he had experienced at the hands of Cobra Kai, Demetri couldn’t bring himself to hate Eli, his binary brother, his best friend. 

His first love, if he was entirely honest with himself. He knew that Eli would never reciprocate those feelings, and he had resigned himself to pining after his best friend for the next eternity. He hated that he yearned for a guy that had physically injured him, hated that he still dreamt of the day Eli would come back to him, Hawk be damned. 

He hated, most of all, that he still nursed those feelings for Eli. Late at night when _those_ thoughts came to him, he fantasized about kissing Eli, touching Eli, those blue eyes, that beautiful lip scar, and how it stretched when he smiled. But he could only fantasize. Dream. Feel homesick, even when there was no home to return to. It drove him insane, thoughts of Eli, Eli _Eli._ Until his mind was muddled and his body ached for a touch that would never come. 

He had to remind himself that Eli didn’t exist anymore. Now, he was Hawk, a horrible amalgamation of everything Demetri hated. Brash and brutal, punching first and thinking second. An alpha male jerk, all brawn, and no brains. The sweet Eli that would give his best Pokemon cards to Demetri, let him take the fluffier blanket during Star Wars marathons, the Eli full of love… he was gone. 

Demetri had spent the better part of four months crying, body hollow with the loss of his best friend, conscience full of all the things he never got to say, how he never got the chance to confess, “I don’t just want you to be my best friend Eli. I love you, I can’t stop thinking about you, _I just love you so goddamn much._ ” 

And now, here he was. Demetri the nerd, Demetri the pussy. At home, laying in bed at 10 o’clock on a Friday night, tears soaking into his pillow, wishing for one more sleepover, one more game, one more round. 

Even though they had fought those Cobra Kai bullies together, even though Eli stood next to him as they trained, he was paralyzed by the fear that the true Eli would never, ever come back to him. That damned mohawk, the permanent mask of fury on Eli’s face, it haunted Demetri. Sometimes, he still woke up in the middle of the night, panting from nightmares of what happened at Golf N’ Stuff. He was _scared_ of his best friend. 

Sighing, he turned over and stood up from his cocoon in bed. He wiped his face roughly with his sleeve, heading to the bathroom to wash up and then catch up on homework. No use crying over spilled milk, he mused, looking up from the sink, studying his face in the mirror. He would just have resign himself to reminiscing about the old days and thirsting after a guy who literally didn’t exist anymore. 

At least Eli didn’t want to kill him anymore. Now, they were just awkward. That ease with which they had interacted was pretty much nonexistent now. Nowadays, they could spar effortlessly, but they could barely hold a ten-minute conversation without karate involved. It was like Eli didn’t remember how to talk to Demetri anymore. Every time he saw Eli’s face, he felt the pit of his stomach roil with fear, longing, and hurt. 

He shut off the light in the bathroom. He didn’t want to deal with all the introspection. It just felt like tearing open a healing wound. It obviously didn’t mean shit to Eli, so why should he care? He cared too much, and that’s what got him in trouble in the first place. Flopping into his desk chair, he reluctantly unzipped his backpack and got to work on his calculus homework. He and Eli had promised each other to study for calculus together, since it was an advanced class and they had to get special permission from the counselor to even take it, along with multiple promises that they would do well. Now, he was doing integrals by himself. As he worked through the problem set, his mind sharpened, and he temporarily forgot about his messy life issues.

He was disturbed by someone pounding on his door. His heart rate spiked immediately. He was home alone. His parents were in Sacramento for his sister’s dance recital. What if it was Tory? Or another Cobra Kai goon? He grabbed his phone from the desk and checked it. No texts from Sam or Miguel, meaning no one from Miyagi-Do was coming over. Throwing caution to the wind, he crept downstairs as quietly as possible and checked the window from the dining room. Above the tall decorative bushes, a familiar red point bobbed up and down. _Shit,_ he thought. _It’s Eli._ He hurried over to the door and fumbled with the latch, cursing himself for the sudden rush of adrenaline. _Shut up, stupid heart. He doesn’t love you._

He finally managed to undo the lock, and he swung the door open, heart overfull of hope, dreading yet anticipating those blue eyes, the familiar hunch, the soft scent. _Eli, Eli, Eli._

What he saw nearly tore his heart in two. Eli’s usually carefully coiffed mohawk was ruined, half up and half down. He cradled his arm to his chest, and his knuckles were bloody. He looked up at Demetri, and Demetri could see visible bruises along Eli’s face and neck, and there were probably more on his body. Eli coughed, and Demetri could see the pain on his face.

“Hey man, look. I know things have been weird between us. I’ve been wanting to, I don’t know. Fix it, or say something. But I don’t know how, so I stayed away. But today, those fucking idiots at Cobra Kai found me, and Tory made good on her promise to get payback. Everything fucking hurts, and I didn’t know where else to go cause Miguel had plans and I don’t know anyone else that would help me and I know I fucked up but I-” Demetri cut him off.

“Just- just come in, _Hawk_.” He said, emphasizing the moniker. Eli flinched at Demetri’s harsh tone. Even though in his heart all he wanted to do was wrap his arms around the redhead and never let him go, his ego couldn’t just let go of the events of the past few months. Eli shuffled in towards the living room with Demetri, his usual bravado and arrogance overcome by pain. “Sit down,” Demetri said, gesturing to the sofa, “I’m going to go get the first aid kit. You can stay the night if you want. I don’t know how you were able to drive here with that arm of yours, but you can’t drive home. The guest bedroom is free, so,” Demetri cut himself off, back turned away from Eli as he rifled through the drawers in the kitchen. He snatched up a bag of cotton balls and the first aid kit from the drawer. He knew that Eli never slept in the guest bedroom. They always slept in Demetri’s bed, but he wasn’t sure if Eli would even want that anymore. He had pretty much gotten used to waking up alone on Saturday mornings, Eli’s half of the bed pristine and untouched. “Anyways, what did they even do to you? Is your arm broken or something?”

“No, but I took a good hit to the elbow cause some douchebag kicked me into the corner of a wall and now it’s super sore,” Eli said, avoiding Demetri’s eyes, “Look, I wouldn’t have come but I really didn’t have anywhere else to go cause my parents are outta town, and-”

“And what? You knew that you could take advantage of my kindness? You thought I would just patch you up, and we could go back to being buddies? I know you think I’m feckless, but that’s pushing it, even for me.” Demetri scoffed, rage marring his features as he tossed the first aid kit onto the sofa. He couldn’t help but mouth off. He was so mixed up. He knew he wanted to help Eli, he knew his heart was breaking to see his best friend in such pain, but he couldn’t bring himself to forgive and forget so easily. 

“I know you’re mad and I know that you have the right to be, but what else can I do, Demetri? I said I was sorry, and I even helped you fight those guys off at the LaRussos’ place,” Eli said, eyebrows scrunched in confusion.

_Why would you ever hurt me, Eli? How could you do that to me? As I cried and screamed and begged you for mercy?_

Demetri pushed down the rising anxiety and sat down next to Eli. He ripped the bag of cotton balls open. “I’m not even going to acknowledge that as an excuse, that’s how shitty it was. And might I add, you literally broke my arm, as I begged you not to! I spend the longest time going to physical therapy because of you, Hawk. And I’m still scared shitless of walking into Golf N’ Stuff, you know. So yeah, there’s a lot more you can do.” He soaked a cotton ball in a bottle of alcohol from the first aid kit. Spotting a small cut on Eli’s temple, Demetri ran his fingers through his hair, holding the red strands back and ruining the remnants of the spikes of hair as he rubbed the cut with a little more force than necessary. He relished in the little hiss of pain the redhead let out, and he tried his damndest not to revel in the softness of Eli’s hair. 

Eli looked up at Demetri, eyes glossy with unshed tears and brows knitted together with his usual fury. Demetri caught the little sniffle Eli tried to hide behind his anger, and _shit shit shit how does he look so beautiful when he cries?_ Demetri coughed, ducking his head as he pulled the cotton ball away. 

“I’m sorry, Dem, okay?” Eli let out, his voice cracking with frustration halfway through. Demetri sucked in a breath at the sound of his old nickname. “I fucked up, and I- I don’t know how to make it right. I was trying so hard to be the most anti-Eli person because I just didn’t want to let people walk all over me. And somehow, that turned into me losing my best friend and becoming the stuff of our nightmares in middle school and I just- I’m not good with words like you, okay? I can’t write sonnets about how sorry I am, I can just say it and hope you’ll understand me,” He snapped, turning away from Demetri, fists clasped in his lap. Demetri studied Eli, watched the way his hair fell into his face and how he pushed it back, the trail of bruises along his jaw, the clench of his bloodied fists. 

“Stop trying to hide from me, then. Face it. You screwed up, right? What happened to all your Cobra Kai bullshit about never turning away from a fight? You want to make me understand? Prove it. Prove to me that you won’t do something stupid like that again.” Demetri placed a small bandage on Eli’s cut, then grasped his hands and started cleaning them, more gently this time. Clearly, Eli was more torn up than he let on.

“Okay,” he sighed, voice still sickly with anger, hands slack in Demetri’s grip. He pushed Demetri’s hands away and looked up at him determinedly. He blew out a breath of air, centering himself. “Look, I spent the longest time hating myself and feeling so weak and helpless, always at the mercy of kids like Kyler, but then Sensei Lawrence came around and I finally felt like I could fight back, you know? And I loved it. And I know as I got more into Cobra Kai I started leaving you behind because you didn’t adapt like I did-”

“I didn’t adapt to what? Beating the shit out of people for giggles? Sorry, I’m not trying to Crabbe and Goyle my way through the world,” Demetri quipped.

“Dude, just shut up and listen,” Eli said, fisting a tuft of his hair in frustration. “I got tricked by Kreese into thinking that being a bully was the only way to escape getting bullied, and that wasn’t right, but I still believe in being a badass. Sensei Lawrence was right. I can be a badass and still have honor.”

“Oh alright, Zuko.”

“God, you’re such a smartass,” Eli said, that familiar look of muted rage sending a chill down Demetri’s spine.

Demetri snorted, “Yeah, that’s us. Smartass and badass.”

“Anyways. I didn’t change like that just because of Kyler and his goons. I also had a lot going on.”

“What are you talking about? You literally tell me everything,” Demetri said, “Well. At least, you used to.” At this, Eli winced and Demetri noticed a tear fall from Eli’s downturned head onto his lap.

“I just had some shit to deal with, alright?! I don’t have to tell you every goddamn thing,” Eli spat out, on the defensive.

“Jesus! Okay, okay. You had some shit going on,” Demetri said placatingly, “So what? That doesn’t excuse what you did.”

“I know it doesn’t-” Eli cut himself off, fuming. “Look, idiot, my shit was that I had a major crisis about us, okay? One day we’re binary brothers or whatever nerd shit and the next, I can’t even talk to you without a fight and I,” he exhaled, avoiding Demetri’s eyes, “I hurt you, and that look you gave me at the comic store when you asked if I would really hurt you, it stuck with me. I should’ve fought honorably. And I didn’t. What happened at Golf N’ Stuff, it was wrong. It was shameful. And I fucking hated it. Fucking hated you for how it made me feel.”

“Wow. Thanks. So now that I’ve helped patch you up, you’re gonna talk shit about me to my face?” Demetri couldn’t believe how fast the moment had been ruined. Here he was, hopeful that he could at least go back to having a best friend to pine for, but this was going worse than he could have ever imagined. Eli shook his head, staring up at the ceiling and blinking rapidly to stall the angry tears. His legs were shaking, a sure sign that he was anxious. Demetri knew all the tells. And usually, he’d put an arm around Eli, speak in low and soothing tones, but now he couldn’t give a damn because _who the fuck does he think he is?_

“No! I mean, there’s one thing I hate, and it’s feeling weak, Dem. It just reminds me of all those years we let those assholes push us around. And you, you make me feel that way. I felt it that night I-” His voice caught in his throat, “I broke your arm. I heard you cry and I felt so fucking shitty and I tried to ignore it, to remember what Kreese said but it felt so _wrong_ to not care. And I felt the same way again at Sensei LaRusso’s place when I saw you held down and I can’t do it Dem, I can’t just ignore that. Even if it’s weak, it’s wrong, and it hurts me to see you hurt,” Eli tucked his chin in towards his chest. 

Demetri was dumbstruck. 

“El- I mean Hawk, what do you mean?” Demetri’s heart was in his throat.

Eli looked up from his lap, his eyes glassy. He smiled that heartbreaking smile and said, “Don’t you get it, Dem? I’ve cut out everything that makes me weak, but I can’t cut you out. I just can’t. Ever since we were kids, I felt like you were the only one who listened, who really got me. I was fine not having any friends, cause you were the only one I wanted around. You just knew. Knew how I felt, if something was wrong, if I was unhappy. And sure, we got our asses kicked, but at least it was together. And that was enough for me, until it wasn’t. Cause one day, I realized that I didn’t just want Friday night sleepovers and Doctor Who marathons,” Eli exhaled unsteadily, running a hand through his hair, “I wanted more.” He peered at Demetri through a curtain of red hair. 

“It’s my fault that everything’s so weird now. It was me. I knew you would never want to be with me like that, so I tried to distance myself from you and Cobra Kai just happened to come along. And being Hawk was fun, for a while. I got the girls, I got the fame, but I lost you. Cause you never accepted Hawk. I was only ever Eli, and I’ll only ever _be_ Eli to you. And honestly, I want it that way. But I can’t keep hiding it from you. You deserve the truth, I’m not gonna run away from that. I’m not the same Eli that was too shy to admit that to myself anymore. I spent too long feeling ashamed about it, and you’re right. I should face it.” He swallowed, then stopped, those striking eyes drilling holes into Demetri, chin lifted boldly, despite the clear look of anguish he had a few minutes ago. Demetri couldn’t believe it. Eli had never spoken this much, especially about his feelings. _His feelings for me,_ he thought giddily. His brain was fried. _Eli likes me._

“Dem?” Eli’s eyes widened in fear, then his shoulders slumped at Demetri’s shell-shocked expression. He slowly eased up off the couch and turned away from Demetri. “Look, I get it. I’m just- I’m gonna go, okay? I’ll lock up, I know where the spare key is,” He said, bitterly. After all he had done, after he had taken the biggest fucking leap of his life, he hadn’t even gotten shot down. He’d just been met with a dumbstruck expression. _Fuck,_ he thought. _Ten years of friendship down the drain, cause you just_ had _to be all honorable._

On his way out, Eli stopped at the island in the kitchen. The picture of them at space camp in middle school was still stuck to the side of the refrigerator. He peeled it off the fridge. They looked so happy, arms around each other with their NASA shirts on. He couldn’t hold it in anymore, and he let out a roar of anger. He couldn’t stop crying, like a weakling. Nothing like Cobra Kai material. All he did was fuck up, and cover it up with tattoos and wacky hairstyles and fake toughness. His chest felt so tight it was painful, and he didn’t know how but he had ended up on his knees, the picture in his shaking fingers, fat teardrops landing on the surface. He punched the tiled floor and relished in the blood that came swiftly to the surface. 

He heard a thump and looked up. Demetri stood at the kitchen entrance, looking down at him, face unreadable. Eli swiftly swallowed his sobs and wiped the tears off his face roughly, welcoming the sting. He couldn’t fathom getting up, walking out the door, and never coming back. He couldn’t do it. Demetri got down on the floor across from Eli, and took the picture from him, wiping the tears off the glossy surface with his flannel sleeve. 

“I totally beat your ass at the simulator exercise,” Demetri remarked, fingers brushing across their tiny smiles. 

Eli snorted through his tears, then sneered at Demetri. “You don’t have to pity me, okay? I don’t need your bullshit about how we’ll still be friends-”

“I remember the first time I saw you on the playground. I wanted to trade Pokémon cards, so I tried to talk to you. You were hunched over, just like you are now. And you didn’t let me see your whole face, you kept covering it with your hands. You know, no matter what I said at that party, I never brought up the scar.”

Eli hated that party. Hated how Demetri had made him feel. But he guessed he deserved it, after everything he’d done.

“I know. But it was still a shitty move to mention the sleep enuresis, asshole.”

“Oh, I know. It was payback for making me smell like beer for the next week. I’m sorry though. You know that the sleep enuresis and your lip scar never mattered to me.” Demetri turned to Eli, hazel eyes intense with some unknown emotion. His eyes flickered down, and Eli reached up unconsciously to cover his scar with his hand. Demetri caught it with his own and lowered it. 

“You shouldn’t hide that, you know. It’s always been perfect,” Demetri said, glancing down to the scar quickly before meeting Eli’s eyes. He leaned in, and Eli’s heart jumped into his throat. As if his body was practicing a familiar kick, Eli automatically leaned into the warmth of Demetri, the scent, the familiarity. 

Before he had even processed it, Eli felt Demetri’s lips on the corner of his mouth, and he short-circuited at the prospect of kissing his best friend, but then he realized: Demetri wasn’t kissing Eli. He was kissing the scar. Eli’s heart swelled with emotion.

“Is this what you’re so embarrassed about? What made you hold back about your feelings for so long?” Demetri whispered huskily, his lips lingering on the dull red skin. He could taste the salt from Eli’s tears, “It’s never been anything but beautiful to me,” He kissed it again, “I love the way it stretches when you smile,” Another kiss, “and I love-” Eli tilted upward and pressed his lips to Demetri’s, hand sliding up to cup Demetri’s neck and pull him in.

_God, I love you so much, Demetri. Dem, Dem, Dem._ Eli could seldom think of anything but the rush of kissing Demetri. This was nothing like kissing Moon. Nothing like anyone could ever do. No one could match up to Dem, his Dem. 

Demetri had imagined this for years, and yet it felt like nothing he could have ever anticipated. He was kissing Eli. _Oh my God, I’m kissing Eli._ Eli’s hand moved against his neck and he could feel the pressure pulling him in towards the redhead. He couldn’t help but sigh against Eli’s lips, mouth slackening in excitement as his fingers settled in luxuriant red hair.

Eli took the opportunity to deepen the kiss, grasping Demetri’s shirt with his other hand and yanking him down further. Surprised by the intensity, Demetri fell forward, hands bracing until he was nearly on top of Eli. The redhead broke the kiss, resting his cheek against Demetri’s and panting from the novelty of it all.

Demetri looked down at Eli, eyes wide and shocked, lips kiss bruised and all the more inviting. Eli couldn’t help but smirk at Demetri’s flabbergasted look.

“Oh, two can play at that game,” Demetri declared. He stood up, then noticed the bloodied knuckles. “Did you screw up your hands again?” His eyes narrowed with worry, and Eli couldn’t help the skip in his heartbeat. _He really cares about me, even after everything I did. I don’t deserve it._

Eli stretched his hand out gratefully. Demetri pulled him up and led him to the living room, hands entwined. Eli felt giddy, but he kept his emotions in check, masking his feelings with his usual brooding expression. 

This time, as Demetri wiped the blood off of Eli’s knuckles, Eli couldn’t help but stare at the curve of Demetri’s jawline, the newfound muscles of his arms, the strength in those fingers. In the short time they’d been apart, Demetri had changed too. It felt like years of emotional tension had come to light, thickening the air between them. He noticed that Demetri’s dexterous fingers trembled slightly as he bandaged the bloody knuckles, then reached up to brush Eli’s hair away from his face to check for more cuts. As he inspected Eli, his hand came to rest on the redhead’s cheek. His eyes flicked up to Eli’s, then down to his lips. 

He leaned in, pressing another kiss against the scar, before resting his forehead against Eli’s. Eli could barely breathe, but he let his eyes meet Demetri’s, knowing that his own were probably filled with years worth of lust and love. Demetri gasped as he closed the gap between them with an open-mouthed kiss. Eli audibly whimpered, bandaged hands pulling Demetri in again. He couldn’t get enough.

“Dem,” He gasped, breaking the kiss again. _Shit, I just wanna kiss him stupid._ “Dem, I’ve been thinking about this for years but I don’t want to do anything that you’re not comfortable with-”

“Shut up,” Demetri groaned against Eli’s lips, “I’ve literally been in love with you for months now and I just now got you back so I’m making up for a hell of a lot of fantasizing,” he said shamelessly, but Eli could see the tips of Demetri’s ears were pink. Eli’s eyes widened.

“You- you thought of kissing me?”

“Yes, oh my God. Literally all the time. Now don’t make it an ego thing or I’ll end you,” Demetri said, with a roll of his eyes. He saw a wicked look form on Eli’s face and he felt himself gulp.

“So you’re okay with this?”

“God, yes. Just shut up and kiss me,” Demetri breathed.

Eli couldn’t argue with that. He stood up from the couch, first aid kit forgotten and tugged Demetri up before dragging him to his room, stopping halfway up the stairs to kiss Demetri so passionately that the brunet stumbled the rest of his way up. By the time he got there, Eli had already had a minute to survey the room. He turned back to Demetri.

“Where’s all my stuff?” He asked, looking hurt. “Did you throw it all away?”

“When we stopped talking, I shoved it all under my bed and in my desk drawers. I could never throw any of it away, but it hurt to look at,” Demetri said, eyes averted. He stood at the edge of his desk, hunched over as if to protect himself. 

Eli walked over to Demetri, who stood at the corner of the room. He took Demetri’s hands in his own and looked him in the eye. 

“I don’t care if I have to spend the next ten years proving it to you, but you won’t ever have to put everything away. Ever. No more pussy shit.” Eli said, eyes blazing. His heart ached for the brunet, who had sustained all this pain. He could see it in Demetri’s eyes. He leaned up and kissed the corner of Demetri’s mouth. Demetri let out a breathy moan, hands buried in Eli’s thicket of hair, tugging slightly and sending shockwaves down his spine. He sighed contentedly, and Demetri made a note of the sensitivity of his hair. Eli grasped him by the waist and pulled him forward until they hit the door, slamming it shut. He groaned at the pain of jostling his sore arm, and Demetri immediately broke their kiss.

“Shit, Eli, are you okay?” It warmed his heart to hear Demetri call him that again and Eli stared dazedly at his lips. “Eli? Eli!”

“You called me Eli,” He said amazedly.

“Yes idiot, but did you hurt yourself? Is now really the time to get rough? I mean, it’s hotter than literally anything I’ve ever experienced but I don’t want you to be in pain,” Demetri said, concern glancing across his angular features. Eli was overcome with love. _This boy, he’s gonna drive me crazy._

“I love you,” Eli blurted out, pressing his lips to Demetri’s collarbone to avoid looking into those piercing eyes. Demetri gasped. “I love you Dem, and I don’t deserve you, ” He murmured, lips still caressing the hollow base of his throat as he pulled Demetri’s shirt down, pressing more kisses to the pale skin of his chest. He breathed against Demetri’s shoulder, air fanning over the sensitive skin, paused for a moment, then bit down firmly at the hollow behind Demetri’s ear, laving over the reddening mark with his tongue.

Demetri whined, sounding absolutely _wrecked._ His arms clung to Eli’s shoulders as he pulled himself flush against the redhead, and Eli took the opportunity to run his hands under Demetri’s shirt. _“_ Eli, I- I love you so much-,” He cut himself off with a hiss as Eli’s cold hands skimmed over his back. He was lit up like a livewire. He was uncharacteristically quiet, no ripostes, no jokes or references.

“You have no idea how many times I played this out in my head,” he said breathlessly, lips against Demetri’s. Eli continued, his leg in between the brunet’s. He stepped forward and walked Demetri backward slowly, burying his face in the brunet’s shoulder and taking in his scent.

“I huh,” Demetri said intelligently, backed up against the edge of his bed. He looked at Eli for a moment and took him in. His scarlet hair was soft, hanging in curves around his jaw. His good arm was around Demetri’s waist, under his shirt. His lips were red and he was panting slightly. Demetri skimmed his hands down Eli’s back, then snuck them under his shirt, raking his nails down the smooth skin. Eli’s breath hitched and he let out a shaky gasp as Demetri brought his hands up again and pulled the shirt off.

Demetri took a moment to recollect himself, let his hands skim down to Eli’s bare waist, fingers grazing reverently across the expanse of toned muscle before he yanked the drawstring of Eli’s sweatpants and pulled them down. He pressed a kiss to the grim reaper on Eli’s chest. _The tattoos are definitely a bonus_. He then pivoted on his heel, switching positions with Eli. The redhead yelped, losing his balance as Demetri pitched forward slightly. They landed with a thump on Demetri’s bed, Demetri sprawled over Eli.

“I told you two can play at that game,” Demetri smirked, “And you just got your ass kicked.”

“We’ll see about that,” Eli laughed, cradling the back of Demetri’s head with his hand. He pulled the brunet down into an open-mouthed kiss, curling his tongue against Demetri’s. Demetri groaned, shifting to slot his leg between Eli’s, arms coming up to rest on either side of his head. He reached back to the hand still entwined in his hair, and pulled it down, lacing their fingers together and pinning it down onto the mattress. He broke away from Eli, laying kisses from the hollow behind his ear to the scar. 

Eli used his free hand to tug at Demetri’s jeans, “Off,” he murmured, fingers struggling with the buttons. Demetri impatiently tugged his jeans down his hips, then his free hand ran up Eli’s torso, grasping his waist and pulling him closer. Demetri looked at him, their noses almost touching. _When did you become so fucking hot, Dem?_

“My turn.” He pulled away from their embrace to shrug his flannel off and Eli keened with the loss of contact. He watched with bated breath as Demetri lifted his shirt over his head, then the redhead yanked him back down and kissed him with fervor, teeth clacking together painfully. He didn’t care. All he could think about was Demetri. 

Between kisses, Demetri whispered, “I may not be a big fan of Hawk, but ahh,” He stuttered as Eli moaned wantonly into his mouth, “I love these,” He scraped his nails down Eli’s toned abs, leaving red trails that he soothed with open-mouthed kisses.

“I love that you’ve got that Hawk persona for everyone else, but you’re just Eli for me,” He looked up from Eli’s torso, eyes full of love. He leaned forward to kiss him and buried his face between the redhead’s neck and shoulder. Eli could hear the unintelligible noises Demetri made. 

“Dem,” Eli whispered. 

“I love you,” Demetri mumbled into Eli’s ear. He punctuated his confession with a nip at Eli’s earlobe, “Loved you since forever, just didn’t know it,” he said, pushing himself up. He tucked Eli’s hair behind his ear and kissed the sharp curve of his jawline before giving him another searing kiss. 

Eli could barely handle the overload of sensations he was feeling. He loved the exhilaration of this aspect of their budding relationship, but he didn’t want to go so fast, yet.

“Dem,” He pressed a kiss to Demetri’s cheek, “Dem, look at me.” 

Demetri pushed himself off of Eli, panting hard.

“Hi,” Eli whispered, shaking his hand loose from Demetri’s grip. He pushed stray strands of hair back from Demetri’s face. 

“Hi,” Demetri grinned, out of breath. 

“C’mere,” Eli pulled Demetri down against his chest. His hair tickled against Eli, and the brunet turned to drop a kiss onto Eli’s neck.

“I’m gonna crush you, Eli,” Demetri said, laughter in his voice.

“I can fix that,” Eli murmured, pushing Demetri off. He sat up and took in the sight of Demetri, shirtless and lying in the bed, resting his head on his arm. That crooked smile made his heart drop. He tugged on Demetri’s arm, coaxing him onto his back, then he plopped back down, snuggling into the junction of Demetri’s shoulder and neck. The brunet’s arms immediately curved around Eli. Eli let his hands skim over the planes of Demetri’s chest. 

“You wanna slow down?” Demetri asked, hand clasping Eli’s to his chest. He could always pick up on the words Eli left unspoken, like a special Bat-Signal just for him. 

“I haven’t… I haven’t done any of this before,” Eli confessed, “And even though I’ve thought about this day forever, I want it to be more special than just on the first day we even confess to each other.” He pulled Demetri’s hand up, comparing the sizes of their fingers. 

“Well, neither have I. And I may have gotten a little carried away,” Demetri said, ruefully, “But I won’t do anything that you don’t want," He added, hands stretching against Eli's, "Your hands are so small compared to mine,” He said, pulling Eli’s hand flush against his own. His fingers were slim and long, veins prominent and palm smooth and wide, but Eli’s were shorter and thicker, his palm rough with calluses and knuckles fraught with scars. 

“Yeah, well. They fit together perfectly,” Eli said, then he felt the blood rush to his cheeks. _What a cheesy thing to say. At least he can’t see me blush._

Demetri giggled, “I can tell you’re blushing, Eli. Your cheek just got warmer.”

_Can this motherfucker read my mind?_

Eli pulled back from Demetri, eyebrows scrunching in annoyance.

“Oh, fuck you,” He snapped, lips unconsciously curled into a pout.

“Aw, you’re cute when you pout, baby,” Demetri said, eyes full of mirth. Eli’s heart skipped a beat. Evidently, his surprise showed on his face, because Demetri’s face lit up with recognition. He avoided Demetri’s eyes, curling back into the brunet’s shoulder.

“Do you like it when I call you baby?” Demetri asked, head resting against Eli’s.

“What? No. Shut up,” Eli said, too fast. _Shit. He caught me._

Demetri leaned away from Eli, mouth moving against his ear.

“Baby,” He whispered, voice husky, “I love you.” His hand trailed up Eli’s chest, stopping at his jaw. He pulled Eli in, kissing him softly. Eli sighed, melting into the kiss. Demetri made his mind all woozy.

Demetri pulled away after a moment, then smiled at Eli.

“I’m never gonna let you live that down. The mighty Hawk, defeater of karate champions, breaker of limbs, and the toughest guy in the whole school, likes to be called 'baby'. And have his hair played with,” Demetri teased, savoring the flustered expression on Eli’s face. 

Eli huffed, flopping down on the bed and turning away from Demetri.

“Asshole,” He muttered.

“Hey, come on,” Demetri said, trying to mollify Eli, “I was just joking.” He shifted, arms pulling Eli’s back in against his chest. “I genuinely do like calling you that,” He continued, tucking his head against Eli’s shoulder, “You have 'Dem,' and I have 'baby'. It’s perfect.”

“Hm,” Eli grunted. He would never admit to it, but he liked being spooned. “I love you,” Eli said, gruffly. 

Demetri hummed against the tattooed wings on Eli’s back, reveling in the shift of his muscles as he shuddered. 

“C’mon. Turn around. Let me see you.”

Eli begrudgingly turned to lay flat on his back. Demetri stuck his arm under Eli’s neck, maneuvering so that Eli could rest against his shoulder again.

“That’s better.”

“Whatever,” Eli said sullenly. His body betrayed him almost immediately though, and he melded himself to Demetri’s body, leg thrown over the brunet’s legs and an arm resting on his chest. 

Demetri’s lips ghosted over Eli’s forehead, and he inhaled the scent of Eli’s shampoo.

“Doesn’t even feel real,” He admitted, a hand grazing through Eli’s hair.

“I know,” Eli mumbled into Demetri’s skin, “And I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?”

“You called me ‘breaker of limbs’. I don’t think I’m ever gonna forgive myself for that,” Eli said, tracing patterns down the arm in question, which was curved in against his waist.

“I hated you for a while, I’ll admit. But if it took breaking my arm for you to end up here, in my bed, all cute and cuddly, after your Grey’s Anatomy-style confession, I’ll break my other arm too,” Demetri said, “I love seeing you like this. No Hawk bull, just Eli. My Eli. My baby,” His voice cut off with a quiet snicker at the end.

Eli harrumphed at the pet name, but his heart trilled. 

“Call me that again, ass,” He threatened half-heartedly.

“Or what? You’re gonna pout at me to death?” 

Eli smacked Demetri on the chest.

“Ow! You wound me, baby,” Demetri said, feigning pain.

“Asshole.”

“I love you, baby.”

“I love you too, asshole.”

“C’mon, I’m no asshole,” Demetri said, waggling his eyebrows, “You wanna kiss me so bad.”

“Ugh. Fine. I love you too, Dem,” Eli said. He pecked Demetri’s lips. “Now shut up. It’s almost eleven. I wanna sleep.”

“Alright,” Demetri said, pushing himself up off the bed, “Off to the guest bedroom you go.”

“What? You don’t…” Eli trailed off, before recognizing the laugh Demetri was barely holding in. Eli fumed. 

“Okay, that’s it,” He spat out, rising to his knees on the mattress, “You absolute asshat,” He smacked the back of Demetri’s head and the brunet yelped with laughter, “Stupid motherfucker,” Another hit, but Demetri caught his arm with a defensive block and pushed his chest back. Before he knew it, he was spread eagle on the bed, Demetri kneeling over him. 

“All about the defense, baby,” Demetri said, kissing Eli’s forehead, “We’re gonna have so much fun sparring from now on. I get a kiss every time your reckless offense gets you screwed over.”

“Asshole,” Eli shifted his legs, wrapping them around one of Demetri’s before he twisted sharply to his left and brought Demetri down next to him, “Go turn off the light,” He burrowed in the covers, sinking down till there was nothing but a shock of red hair visible on the pillow. Demetri stood up, and he heard the padding of footsteps receding from the bed. 

“Going to get a drink of water, ‘kay?”

“Hm,” He hummed, already feeling the pull of sleep. He could hear Demetri’s light steps downstairs.

He heard a click a few moments later, then felt Demetri lift the covers up and slide in beside him. 

“This feels just like ten years ago when we had our first sleepover,” Demetri said, “Me turning off the light, cause you were scared of the dark. I’m glad that I have you back. It felt so lonely sleeping by myself here every Friday night.”

Eli knew he wouldn’t have the words to express how sorry he felt, how he ached to go back and fix things, so he feigned sleep. _I’ll make it up to you, Dem. I will._

“I love you. I know you love me too, and I know you’re probably feeling guilty for what happened, and we still have a long way to go from here. But as long as I’ve got you, and you’ve got me, it doesn’t matter. I’m not ever gonna let you leave. Whatever happens, okay? Goodnight, baby.” Demetri said, settling in. He kissed the top of Eli’s head, then turned, curving his body inward to fit the contours of Eli’s figure. Within fifteen minutes, his breathing had deepened and Eli knew he was asleep. _He always did fall asleep ridiculously fast._

“I love you, Dem,” He whispered. Eli said nothing else, couldn’t bring himself to put the words out there, he just pulled Demetri’s arms tighter around him and curled in, pushing as much love as possible into his actions. _I missed you, I’m sorry, I’ll never leave you again._

But he knew that Demetri would understand. He always did. 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Debating making this a twoshot with some content of them sparring, let me know if that would mesh well with the story! Thank you for reading :)


End file.
